Hello to all dear visitors to my child’s world, the family is the child’s only safe haven during his periods of development, especially in his early years, and the relationship between the parents has the greatest role and influence in this. Remarkably, conflict and quarrels between parents make it easier for children to quarrel among themselves, because the atmosphere at home becomes tense and children enjoy imitating. Marital disputes have a profound impact on the child, and many may not realize its extent until it is too late. Let us pay close attention.
The importance of agreeing on unified educational rules in raising children:
It
is important for there to be an agreement between parents on an
appropriate educational method because it has necessary and important
factors and benefits in building the personality of their children.
Among these benefits are:
- Creating a calm atmosphere in which the child can grow up.
- Building the child’s confidence in the father and mother.
- Feeling safe for the child.
- Building the child’s self-confidence.
- Encouraging the child to express himself and express his opinion without fear.
- Training the child to face his problems and try to solve them calmly.
- Teaching the child the principle of respect for others.
- The child’s psychological stability.
- Healthy mental development of the child.
- Helping the child develop his skills in all fields.
When
the parents agree on unified parenting methods for raising children,
the child will receive the information or principle that we want to
teach, but if we do not agree, different messages will reach the child
and he will become distracted. Care must also be taken to agree with
any other person who helps in raising the child, such as the grandfather
or grandmother, so that the principles that reach the child are
unified.
The impact of marital disputes on the psychology, mind, and behavior of children:
Its effects on children:
One
of the most prominent effects of marital disputes on a child is that he
becomes accustomed to a pattern of violent behavior and quarrels. He
begins to behave aggressively and violently with his peers and tends to
always cause problems.
Children
who are accustomed to having problems between their parents resort to
resolving their disputes with their siblings and friends using the same
methods that they saw their parents using among themselves.
Parental
disputes and frequent family problems cause children to develop eating
disorders such as anorexia, which results in weight loss, such as
stomach problems, headaches, and sleeping difficulties.
The
child's sense of security dies little by little, and he is overcome by a
feeling of sadness, panic, and fear most of the time, which undermines
his confidence in himself and in all his surroundings, including his
teachers and friends. He becomes antisocial, in addition to a decline in
his academic and cognitive level.
Its effects on teenagers:
Adolescents
are in this sensitive stage, as they grow accustomed to the existence
of family disputes, and they find it difficult to determine who they can
truly trust in their lives, and they suffer greatly from the problem of
trusting others.
As
they become aggressive and trouble-makers, they have difficulty
adapting to studying, whether with students or with professors.
The
teenager's living in a home where there are frequent disagreements and
quarrels provides the ground for him to turn to methods without
supervision, such as early smoking, drinking alcoholic substances, and
drug abuse, and these methods have devastating results.
They
have a very negative and dark idea about life, so their self-esteem
decreases, and their actions are based on the deterioration of their
self-image.
The child’s relationship with the quarreling parents:
Children
who grow up in homes where there are many quarrels and disagreements
have negative views about family relationships and the value of family
cohesion in general. You will find that they tend to stay alone and do
not like to sit with their parents.
One
of the most important factors that connects a child and his parents is
trust. With the frequent presence of marital problems and quarrels, we
find that it diminishes little by little until it ceases to exist, and
the relationship becomes dry.
Quarrels
and disagreements between spouses are stressful and exhausting, which
makes parents not spend time with their children to care for them and
take care of them as they should. All of this affects the quality of
the relationship, making it difficult for them to show warmth and
affection.
Keys to stability and overcoming marital problems:
Understanding and good listening:
You
must understand each other as a couple and listen to each other’s
opinions without interrupting or arguing. You must know that God created
each person with a different makeup than others, and your ability to
understand each other is a large part of overcoming differences that
lead to problems.
Privacy and confidentiality:
Make
your life yours alone, as you know the details of your life and your
circumstances, and the interference of others is the cause of
discussions and quarrels. Sit together, talk a lot, and agree together
on matters of managing your life on your own.
Stop comparisons:
If
you compare your lives, you will never be satisfied and you will live
in conflicts and differences forever. So stop comparing and be
satisfied and confident that people’s circumstances and lives are not
similar to each other. You cannot take anyone’s life as a standard and
you cannot compare your lives to the lives of others.
Appreciation and respect:
If
you do not appreciate the effort you are making and do not respect it,
you will be responsible for causing problems and destroying life between
you. Respect and appreciate each other even if you disagree.
Don't hold back:
If
you are stingy with each other, whether in feelings or money, or you
are harsh and harsh in your dealings, then problems will inevitably
arise. Therefore, provide love and make an effort to show each other
your love and care.
Honesty and frankness:
Lying
can never make you live a stable and normal life, and what you hide
today will be revealed later and will bring you problems and
unhappiness. Therefore, be frank and honest together from the beginning
and express your feelings and personalities to each other with all
sincerity and clarity.
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Kids