Kids

Building a strong relationship with the child increases his feeling of security: Very important rules for building a relationship and creating a sense of security for my child

Hello to all dear visitors to my child’s world, one of the most important feelings that we must strive to make our children feel is their sense of security. In recent years, some educational philosophies have emerged that advise parents to communicate and bond with their children from birth in an intimate manner and to communicate their psychological and emotional needs, and this makes them feel comfortable. Reassurance is similar to the fact that it strengthens the relationship with their families in a healthy and correct way. A child who enjoys intimate communication with his parents can deal with his fears and anxieties better throughout his various periods of development and at all stages of his life.

How can I win the heart of my children??

Dealing with children from a standpoint of power and control is what most destroys the

positive relationship between children and their parents because life then turns into a power war and a power struggle, with each party trying to prove that it is stronger and can control more. While mercy, tenderness and affection open closed locks and soften iron..
Therefore, in order to win over your children, treat them as friends who are equal in status, power, rights, and duties. You must also care about their feelings, take their opinions, play with them, have fun with them, laugh together, and talk a lot.

You will discover at one time that in the crucial matters in which you are forced to use your parental authority and firmness, they accept that with satisfaction, and receive your words with love, calmness, and satisfaction, and they hear your words even if they are not convinced. This is because your credit in their hearts allows for this and more.

أهم فوائد متعددة للتواصل الحميمي مع الأطفال:

At the behavioral level:

The child feels safe, mutual trust and independence, learns the correct ways to treat others and behaves better, and grows up to understand and listen more to his parents.

On the social level:

- Be social, cooperative, understanding, and sympathetic. These are among the important values that require time to instill in the child’s mind unless they have been since his early childhood.

- He also does not find it difficult to deal well with different ages and helps, participates, benefits and influences.

- He has a passion for learning, is enthusiastic and flexible, his self-esteem is high, and he is confident in himself and his abilities.

On the emotional level:

A child is able to understand and express his feelings, and this helps him understand and accept the feelings of others.

He has a high sense of evaluating right and wrong throughout his years, and is morally developed.

How should we communicate with our children to make them feel safe??

Communication habits should be established early:

Do you listen to the problems of your young child in kindergarten or with his friends, even if you have tasks that are more important than that?! He is more likely to turn to you and tell you about his problems when he is a teenager because he knows that you are always there and can listen to him whenever he needs it, so you must make your time with your children a priority and allocate time for him every day.

Having trust:

Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship and begins at birth when your infant learns that you care for him and carry him when he cries and needs you. Children's trust in their parents depends on the extent to which the parents meet their psychological, emotional, and physical needs, and over time we gain our children's trust in different ways, such as fulfilling promises.

Encouragement:

There is a famous saying by the scientist Rudolf Dreikers that says: Encouragement for children is like water for a plant. Imagine that your child is like a plant that grows and flourishes naturally. If you see this plant withering and its leaves becoming brown, you are thinking whether it needs more light, water, etc. But you do not criticize him or shout at him to grow well and not wither. Children form their own view of themselves, of the adults around them, and of the world. They need your encouragement to see themselves as good people capable of doing right and good things, and they need to feel that you are there for them. But if most of what you say to them is correcting their actions or criticizing them, they will not feel like they are good people.

mutual respect:

Respect must be mutual and not limited to children only. Just as he respects you, you must respect him. Although this is a basic principle, we sometimes forget it with our children. You can and should set limits, but if you set them with respect and compassion, your child will learn to treat others with respect and will only accept others to treat him with respect as well.

Ensuring the safety of daily interactions:

You do not have to do special things to build a relationship with your child. The good news here and the bad news is that every daily interaction affects the relationship between you. Shopping, bedtime, tantrums, sibling quarrels, he doesn't want to share his toy, do his schoolwork, or sleep: your dealings with him in all of these daily challenges is considered the cornerstone of your lasting relationship later on and also provides him with a model of how relationships should be.

7. Do not take things personally:

If your teen slams the door, or your 10-year-old says, “Mommy, you never understand me,” or your 4-year-old shouts, “Daddy, I don’t love you.” Always remember not to take these actions personally. The matter does not concern you as a parent, but rather concerns them. They have many conflicting feelings within them and find it difficult to control themselves due to age and the immaturity of their ability to understand feelings and express them in a correct and understandable manner.

If you encounter a situation like this, we advise you to:

- Calm down and take a deep breath.

- Remind yourself that your child really loves you, but he is under the pressure of anger at that moment.

- Avoid shouting and lower your voice.

Try to remember how you felt as an angry child.

Try to think about how to respond sympathetically and constructively.

What you should do in those times is to act with compassion and love instead of anger, even as you set boundaries.

Resist the urge to punish:

Remember that what is paramount here is the child’s interest, and also remember that your goal is to build a strong relationship, control behavior, and correct a specific situation that concerns your loved one. Imagine how you would feel about someone who hurts you, threatens you, or insults you? Children need your guidance, but punishment destroys your relationship and makes the child's behavior worse.

Don't allow gaps to build up in your relationship:

Remember that every challenge or problem is an opportunity to grow closer or create a greater gap. Try not to ignore stressful situations and use them to build rapprochement, empathy, and communication with your child.